Friday, April 29, 2011

ALLURE

Amazing and Awesome April 29,2011
9:45 a.m.

Yesterday’s reflection was devoted on intuition. I was not inclined to talk about it. I can actually write a handful on this special gift I possess. But, my blog would be like an suspense thriller novel. Maybe perhaps some other time.

April 29 reflection has to do with Allure: The Feminine Mystique.

I want to copy each and every word of Sarah on this. It is simply beautiful how she plays her thoughts with the proper weaving of words...in every heartbeat at a time. Here she goes:

Ingrid Bergman had it in Casablanca. Fifty years later, Michele Pfeiffer epitomized it as Edith Wharton’s heroine, Countess Ellen Olenska, in the film version of The Age of Innocence. It is allure, the mesmerizing power to entice or attract through personal charm and mystery.

We’re not much into the mystery these days, which is a pity. These are times of tell-all-talk shows, tattletale books, and tabloid truths. Ntozake Shange believe that “ Where there is a woman, there should be mystery. What intrigues me most is the mystery- allure- of how some women seem to pull it all together so effortlessly. This is the aspect of the feminine mystique that compels and invites investigation. Who are these women and how did they evolve into these higher beings?

You see them in business meetings- confident, assured, and in command- or smiling serenely in the hallway at school while waiting patiently to pick up the afternoon car pool, a baby over one shoulder, a toddler in tow. These women don’t look frazzled, fatigued, or fed up; they look fabulous. They do simply juggle; they fly through the air with the greatest of ease. You wonder: what is their secret? Are they on Prozac? Is it plenty of money, being well organized, positive thinking, or the favourable alignment of celestial bodies? Perhaps it is something more profound: a deep spiritual connection.


(Oh how I love these part. It is something I have yet to evolve into. Soon, I hope.)

Does the computer ever break down when these women are on a deadline, do the kids ever whine, does the car ever need to be towed, have they ever taken a dog who just wrestled with a porcupine to the vet?

(Hark! Hark! This picture in my mind is so hilarious.)

You and I have, which is why occasionally Rio de Janeiro sounds appealing.

(or perhaps this animation film called RIO, we have yet to watch it.)

Then without missing a beat you wipe a snotty nose, change a dirty diaper, defrost the hamburger in the microwave, start the spaghetti sauce, sew a button on a coat, help someone with her homework. You pause for a moment, wondering what they would do if you weren’t here and realize in the same breath that you’re awfully glad you are. Much to your astonishment, it occurs to you that you must also possess some aspect of allure because everybody in the house gravitates to you. In the middle of the night they call you name.
And there’s certainly enough mystery to ponder-such as the mystery of what will happen next. But instead of worrying or obsessing, you decide to just let go and see what occurs. You choose to take joy in your real life as it unfolds day by day,, hour by hour, a heartbeat at a time. Emily Dickinson confessed that “ To live is so startling, it leaves little time for anything else.” Your face may never end up on the silver screen. Nor will mine. But we can arrive at an inner awareness that just living and loving it all is alluring enough.


Just as well, my inner resolve to make this blogging efforts of mine be a mystifying and de-mystifying aspect of my being.
The more I share or reveal, the more it will lock in the factor of allure and maybe I can soon realize one of the items in my bucket list...to be part of a great movie production...with maybe my name as title? Hilarious perhaps...so we shall see.

Thursday, April 28, 2011

Touch

Amazing and Awesome April 28,2011
12 noon

April 27 reflection of Sarah focuses on the topic entitled: Reach Out and Touch Someone.

She begins with sharing an experience of her friend in healing massage therapy that has tremendously benefited this friend so much. Her friend is a single mother with 2 boys to raise and a career to pursue. Sarah claims that her friend regularly has her massage sessions and has now lessened her sick days.

When Sarah herself experienced her first full body massage, she felt so refreshed and rejuvenated that it was like a tingling and bubbling feeling likened to having champagne for breakfast. It made her very light and in tip top condition afterwards.

Experiments has also pointed out that new born babies have to be cuddled and held a lot. A study made somewhere in Russia revealed that babies in the nursery that received minimal or no touch at all, had low weight gain and soon died of natural causes, while babies in the same nursery, that were given regular touch and cuddling sessions had rapid weight gain and did not get sick easily.

Being away from my husband for long stretches as we are onto our 2nd year being distant due to employment pursuits, has truly put a strain and a challenge to my need to be held now and then by him.

In today’s gospel reading, Jesus challenges us to “...touch me and see....” (Luke 24: 35-48) in the disciples shock and disbelief to see him alive and breaking bread with them after He was crucified to death, it was utterly difficult for them to absorb his actual presence among them.

Many times, Jesus, has saved me from my need to be intimate with my husband. He has blessed us with creative ways to be truly together and as one, not necessarily in body, but in spirit and words.

God’s grace is indeed truly sufficient.

Another longing I have lately is to be able to hold my new born in my arms. I am impatient and excited to have the same experience again with my first born. Holding Marina for the first time in my arms was so exhilarating. I did not like to let go of her...our nursing session dragged to hours without me noticing the time. Ruel had to go back to my room and doze off cause, I was taking so long..and so when I was done, my escort and wheelchair was no longer waiting for me...and yet, I was able to walk back to my room, slowly, and yet...so refreshed and so renewed with the feeling of being so very blessed with that bundle that has been a source of a lot of joy and learning experiences.

“ O world invicible, we view thee,
O world intangible, we touch thee,
O world unknowable, we know thee.” - Francis Thompson

And finally: “ Let us become women who embrace our portion of earthly years with a passion by delighting in our sense of touch.” ( Sarah Ban Breathnach, Simple Abundance, April 27 reflection)

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

The Concerto of Real Life

Amazing and Awesome April 26,2011
12:25 p.m.

I have missed doing my Daily Dialogue, Affirmations, Forgiveness and Thanksgiving list for several days now.
The Holy Week activities did really challenge me physically.
By God’s grace, I was able to do our Bisita Iglesia and Seven Last words reflection.
Easter Mass morning then Egg Hunting for Mari in the chapel grounds in Grandpa’s neighbourhood.
Yes, indeed, man proposes and God disposes.
Or is it the other way around?
For one moment there, I am not sure.
Let us see...
We make plans and yet, sometimes, God has a different plan.
Example, we were set to do the Bisita Iglesia at 6pm but as we got to San Roque church, the mass was just starting. I thought it would be much earlier. So, Eleanor said, let’s go to mass first. I planned to just start it, then leave half way, so we wont finish so late in the Bisita Iglesia, but...then, a Greeter and Collector lady, asked me to join the offertory group. I hesitated. My walk has somehow transformed into a waddle...and somehow, walking the long aisle like a big bellied penguin was something not so welcome for me.
Eleanor said yes for me.
And so, it was God’s plan maybe...cause, it was such a blessed and blissful experience. I felt so high being handed the big chalice containing the host of Christ to be offered in behalf of the community.
It was indescribable.
God wanted me to do it, despite my other plans...and so I obliged and yes, He equipped me...my waddle was somehow not so pronounced.... I was not swaying left to right as I walk back to my seat...I was somehow, floating and sashaying gracefully.
Hahahah...and indeed everything fell into place.
God is good.
For today’s reflection...Sarah focuses on the Major and Minor Chords of Pleasure. In life, she says, it is when one thing is taken away from us, that we only realize their importance. Example, if say our sense of hearing is all of a sudden taken away from us....it is such a traumatic experience.
Imagine, you not being able to hear, the tap water flowing...or a river rushing with full force...or your husband’s deep snoring beside you, reminding you, with each rise and fall of his sounds, that he loves you...or the steps of your daughter eagerly and excited to kiss you goodbye as she runs off to her Taekwondo class...or her telling you ...Mama you are beautiful...out of the blue.
Hmmm....
Or.....” ....exquisite sound of silence cascading over me when I momentarily let go and allow the Universe to proceed without my assistance or supervision; and music to soothe, inspire, and move me in unexpected waves of sublime pleasure. The concerto of Real Life is playing, delight with thanksgiving in the major and minor chords of it’s beautiful refrain.” (April 26 reflection, Simple Abundance , Sarah Ban Breathnach)

Thursday, April 21, 2011

In Denial and Betrayal

Amazing and Awesome April 21,2011
7:45a.m.


IN DENIAL AND BETRAYAL

As we reflect and observe Holy Thursday today, I marvel and am in awe at the very simple and yet powerful message of LOVE of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.
He knew that Peter would deny him several times.
He also knew that Judas would betray Him.
And yet, He washed their feet for them and broke bread with them in the Feast of the Passover.
This week, since Palm Sunday, I was able to watch the powerful film by Mel Gibson, the Passion of Christ.
Several years now, it is my tradition to watch this oh so powerful and vivid film of Jesus, passion, death and resurrection.
Last Tuesday, in replacement for my English Tutorial class for 2 brothers (9 and 10 year old), We watched it again with Marina.
The 10 minute scourging at the pillar was a ghastly sight to watch for them.
They were like glued to the laptop screen.
Marina and I could not bare watching it.
The boys were so transfixed.
It was so interesting to watch them.
They would gasp and flinch now and then as if feeling the pain themselves.
The part where Jesus’ hands were being nailed on the cross,
Joshua and Jerome were starting to exclaim their objections.
And they were anticipating the excruciating pain of the feet part .
For me, as always, I could not bare watch it.
I just listened to the audio...and when the film would show Mama Mary, taking this all in...I was just thinking...Oh My...what terrible agony to watch your own flesh and blood go through such suffering and death.
Yes, indeed, the film Passion of Christ is a good reflection on the great and final work of Jesus for our salvation.
Put in the perspective of all our trivial sufferings and bickering...all seems so small and finite.
The passion of Christ is such a big deal in contrast that requires a positive response from me in my life.
That I, with God’s grace and Mama Mary’s presence...
can overcome, all the denials and rejections and betrayals that I am constantly faced with each day, as I struggle and fall and rise in trudging the road less travelled.

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Replenishment and Rejuvenation

Amazing and Awesome April 19,2011
10:55a.m.

Today’s reflection by Sarah Ban Breathnach is on SPRING RITUALS OF REPLENISHMENT.

She starts with a quote from Edward Carpenter:

“ Let your mind be quiet, realizing the beauty of the world, and the immense, the boundless treasures that it holds in store.

All that you have within you, all that your heart desires, all that your nature so specially fits you for- that or the counterpart of it waits embedded in the great Whole, for you. It will surely come to you.

Yet equally surely not one moment before it’s appointed time will it come. All your crying and fever and reaching out of hands will make no difference.

Therefore do not begin that game at all.”

Hmmmm....

Let me proceed by quoting the whole short reflection by Sarah:

This is the season of renewal and replenishment. What better way to begin than to meditate on English poet Edward Carpenter’s assurance that all our needs will be satisfied by the great Whole. Whatever we are waiting for-peace of mind, contentment, grace, the inner awareness of Simple Abundance- it will surely come to us, but only when we are ready to receive it with an open and grateful heart.

While you are waiting patiently, take comfort and joy in simple springtime rituals of rejuvenation. A favourite of mine is to search for a new sacred space out in the world. This reminds me that we carry our serenity with us. A shady grove of trees in an old cemetery, a beautiful public garden that’s new to you, a museum gallery, the stacks of an old library, the hush of a quiet chapel where you light a candle, even an outdoor cafe where you can sit basking in the sunshine can help you realize the boundless treasure and spiritual replenishment of a perfect solitary hour. Joseph Campbell tells us that “ the sacred space and sacred time and something joyous to do is all we need. Almost then becomes a continous and increasing joy.”

Hmmmmm....simply rejuvenating.
Simply refreshing to focus on.
Thank you Sarah.
Thank you Lord for this moment of grace.

Friday, April 15, 2011

SHALOM

Amazing and Awesome April 15,2011
10:15 a.m.

PEACE
There are times, I cannot help reading ahead in the daily reflections of Sarah. For the rest of the days in this Amazing and Awesome month, she focuses on bringing out one’s authenticity and beauty. Next month she delves into one very challenging and sensitive topic...one’s abode.
I chose to talk on peace for my reflection today. It is one of the basic principles of Simple Abundance.
While I write, Mang Henry, our apartment handy man is chipping away cement of my apartment floor. The pounding, the clink of his iron materials, the spray of broken chips and pieces of cement and dust...is a challenge to my sanity and peace.
I am expecting our apartment administrator to drop by anytime soon. Hopefully as she has promised for the nth time.
I have been waiting and waiting for this since, last Wednesday.
Since last January actually.
Since last year truthfully.
Maybe...hopefully, I will be as cool and serene as Grace Kelly again.
The challenges we face in the apartment has been like a work in progress or testament to my frail and fragile patience.
These past few days, it was all the more tested because, Shirley, the apartment administrator, wants to increase the rent by July despite it's sorry state of the much needed and long overdue repair. She suggested that we vacate the premises instead so they can work on the repair which has been like more than a year’s wait already on our part.
I am sorry, but, this blog will be like a vent of some sort this time.
I just hate it when people of power and authority use their positions to coerce and manipulate people into obliging with their agenda and poor business practices.
It seems, they do not like to do any repair and so, the poor tenant will just throw his hands up in despair and frustration and leave. So, they can just repaint the apartment so it will look nice again, not minding the major issues of plumbing and drainage that has really tested our wits and wills.
Each new tenant offers them a chance to increase the rent. There is no such thing as long term relationships for them or honest to goodness repair. Everything is stop gap. So, the problems are perennial. It does not get resolved.
So, we shall see if she indeed really comes.
I am asking the much needed grace and portion of patience to be able to not lose my cool.
After all, being plagued for more than one year with this challenges is really too much.
I am happy with my neighbourhood that we have come to love for the past 7 years now. So, moving out is not an option for us for this year or next. Having a baby and delivery my baby is not the time for me to be moving homes. Besides, my hubby is still off shore and relocating to our new home without him is something I do not look forward to.
My movement and mobility is being challenge so much lately. Lying down, sitting, walking, bathing or simply putting on my undies and clothes is quite a major feat.
I claim and trust that I will be blessed with the grace to be peaceful and graceful despite all these din around me.
All will be well.
Order, harmony, peace, joy, gratitude, beauty is surrounding me now.
I bask in it’s fruits and blessings.
Shalom. Ommmmm...ommmm.

Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Simple Abundance: JOY

Amazing and Awesome April 13,2011
7:50 a.m.

JOY

I just shared some nice words with a long lost HS classmate named Joy. Thanks to Facebook this is possible.
I just posted a video of Sarah Ban Breathnach on my Facebook profile page. She talks briefly about the principles of Simple Abundance. Joy is one of them.
Yes....focus on these things...and they will be multiply in your life.
I want to thank God for the following joys in my life this morning:
1. Early rising and the response to the call to prayer.
2. Hearing the nearby Shrine of the Divine Mercy church bells chime as soon as I finished my rosaries.
3. Cool blue skies from my bedroom window.
4. The incessant chirping of birds this morning.
5. Dogs barking and some chickens clucking, roosters crowing.
6. The sound of my neighborhood coming awake.
7. Cool morning breeze and clean and crisp yellow bed sheet in my still warm bed.
8. Reaching out to touch my princess beside me.
9. Lovely thoughts of my distant hubby reminding me I am beautiful.
10. Amazing grace to be alive today!

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Loving and Honoring One's Body

Amazing and Awesome April 12, 2011
10:35 a.m.

LEARNING TO LOVE AND HONOR YOUR BODY

Today’s Simple Abundance reflection by Sarah Ban Breathnach is on learning to love and honor one’s body.
Come to think of it, it is the only one we have got from the start to the finish.
So, how we take care of it, pamper , ignore it, hate it, will determine the mileage and the quality of the ride.
Well, of course, there are a lot of other factors beyond our control, like the amount of pesticides that jump into our food with the vegetables we purchase. Now, it is no longer just the pesticide scare, but the amount of radioactive elements/ traces that can now be found in air, land and water c/o the great temblor in Japan.
Hmmmm...
Making peace with the one’s body type is probably the first step we can make in absolute liberation.
Freedom from the pressure of looking like a glossed over fashion mag cover all of the time.
Or a beauty queen gliding in the ramp with a pasted smile and carrying a bouquet in one hand.
Lately, if people constantly tell me I am so huge and look like a Buddha, I am able to easily muster a smile and even prod them to rub my belly for good luck.
I have accepted that with the growing miracle inside me...my body is being prepared for the nursing and nurturing of the soon to pop human being.
Brazo the Mercedes arms...I do not cringe so much when I see them. I just tell myself, it will develop into muscles with the cradling and carrying of the little one soon.
So, whatever body I am blessed with, I am almost 99% at peace.
I have no other choice but to make it a pleasant ride as much as possible.
With a positive thought, all things are positively possible.

Monday, April 11, 2011

Nouvelle Cuisine

Amazing and Awesome April 11,2011
10:45 a.m.


Today, I woke up with a warm gentle feeling over me. Several times, the baby in the belly, made his/her wonderful presence felt when maybe perhaps, my position was cramping him/her. It made me smile.

My Sunday yesterday was indeed a day of replenishment and rejuvenation. My older brother Chubby invited us for dinner at home. He is a very good cook. He prepared Tacos, Fettucine Pasta with black yummy capers and tuna and ordered Shakey’s pizza.

The mood over dinner was very light and nice.

After dinner, the cousins Nina and Marina watched the movie UP to which we glanced to now and then.

Still drooling over the pasta. It was so divine. Nouvelle Cuisine at home yes indeed.

It was simple food but it was so fulfilling.

The ingredients of love and acceptance permeating the air, indeed make ordinary things spectacular that a humble fare can be a King’s ransom.

Simple Abundance is not about frugality and living on fear.

Instead, it focuses on simple and affordable luxuries that give extra color and vibrancy to life.

Sarah said, the Quakers live in very simple circumstances and yet, when they eat, they use the choicest ingredients that are at par or much better than/ with designer restaurants in New York, way ahead of the gourmet and organic craze.

Sunday, April 10, 2011

Vicissitudes and Tenterhooks

Amazing and Awesome April 10,2011
8:25 a.m.

These past few days, after 20+ years of having the Simple Abundance book by Sarah Ban Breathnach close on hand, like a north star guiding me in rough and still waters, I have finally googled her and seen pictures and videos of her.
My...it is so nice to match my own picture of her to her real photo.
I also learned that she pronounces her last name in a very novel way. Ban Breenak. Or something like that.
I actually like to pronounce it as breath as in take my breath away.
And nach as in snatch.
I think it is more apt to my experience with her book.
It does takes my breath away...but with the beautiful reflections and rounding off possibilities of life’s vicissitudes...the ebb and tide of tenterhook moments...give way to sublime feeling of wholeness and calm.

Thursday, April 7, 2011

LESS IS MORE

Amazing and Awesome April 7,2011
9:01 a.m.

Sarah Ban Breathnach’s reflections for the past few days focus once again on discovering one’s authentic self by paring down on certain things in our life. From the choice of needs over wants to how we clothe ourselves. From fashion to architecture, less is almost always more.
I just let go of my 2 sofa chairs, that has been with us since the start of my family. My husband bought it for our first home which was just a one studio thing.
I learned to love it through the years.
But as we moved into a much smaller apartment it became something of a sore thumb. The size did not fit in very well.
So, I let go of the long couch first despite the obvious displeasure of both my hubby and my pre-schooler.
And finally, after several years, I finally let go of the 2 arm chairs which have been so scratched and peeling off already.
Many attempts to have it re-upholstered have been unsuccessful.
Either hubby and I would at times, rescind on the plan.
So, thank God, finally, it is gone.
I am enjoying the empty space it formerly occupied.
And after several days of leaving it in a sorry state... my daughter and I have slowly transformed it into a reading nook for her. She and I love it so much.
I am so thrilled to see her new choicest books take up pleasant residence on the top level of the small shelf my brother asked me to babysit for him.
The wonder and fun of reading time my daughter and I get from the book of box we just got of The Diary of the Wimpy Kid shares the space with her modest volume of Nancy Drew books which were last Christmas gift to Marina.
The Diary collection was her end of the home school year reward. Something which I found as a good investment although it caused quite a dent on my pocket over the weekend.
Definitely, letting go is major step one has to master in order to bask in the holy principle of Less is More.
Thanks Sarah for showing me the way through all these years.

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

I am so HAPPY!

I just got a bit of good news as I was about to turn in for the night.
Hubby and I have just patched some loose things up.
Our version of kiss and make up via cyberspace is another feather to creativity.
hahaha.
Anyway, it is something that will fill up pages of some next blog I will create when I have the guts to talk and share about these intimate stuff.
Google just approved my application for ADSENSE.
Hurray!
I just hope and pray the good Lord will bless this endeavour to success.
Just like Jabez, I pray for an increase in territory.
I will continue my reflections on the Simple Abundance book of Sarah Ban Breathnach. Then, I will find a way to include my daughter's blog on homeschooling and many other things.
See you soon.
Thanks for following.

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Cool Under Extreme Pressure

Amazing April 3,2011
9:25 a.m.


Wow! April started with such a blast. It almost blew me out of this world. The good thing was that I was able to keep my poise and composure. Something so unlike me, the scattered brained scaredy cat me.
No... this time I was like Grace Kelly in elegance and class.
They attempted to embarrass me.
They hurt my cub.
The lioness in me...took everything in stride.
I chose to just grin and bear it first.
Then the process of justice and retribution will begin in the proper course and courts of time.
I pat myself for accomplishing such a feat when they went for the jugular then turned around and said, I was just making a ghost.
My perception was faulty.
Adding insult to injury.
I was already dealt a heavy blow and say I just imagined it????
Hmmmmm.... and so we shall see.
I still claim this month to be Amazing and Awesome...despite the awful start.
I am in the process of moving from indignation to inspiration to take this negative situation to a positive level where the light of Jesus will shine.
Let me end, this almost angst riddled blog with the quote from April 3 reflection of Sarah:
“ Inside myself is a place where I live all alone and that’s where I renew springs that never dry up.”
( Pearl Buck)