September 14,2014
5:28am
It is mom’s 78th birthday today.
I have been avoiding writing about her lately because,
missing her is a bit painful this year. Why? Well, suffice it to say, that
these are the times, I would need a mother’s presence and words most .
I cannot help
celebrating the month of September without
remembering or honoring
my mother’s memory.
September is also the nativity month of my powerful , spiritual mother, Our Blessed
Lady.
It is not easy.
I am bombarded with thoughts and consideration of the
inevitable, our own, my own mortality.
I just realized again, with much regret and remorse, that we do not know the time or the manner,
but, death, is most certain.
The picture and
gruesome news of how some people
were robbed of their life, has left me, quite shaken to the core.
It is quite an insecure and uncomforting thought.
That is why, I seek comfort and refuge, that my Lord and
my Savior, has conquered death for me, already.
The battle has been won.
I simply have to make my decision, to follow with faith, hope and love safely tucked in my
heart , mind and soul.
A few weeks ago, by chance, a book fell into my lap and
it has signaled the theme of my blog today.
Mitch Ablom’s For One More Day.
What if we are given a chance to spend one more day with
a lost love one, how would we spend it?
What are the questions we would ask?
What are the places and activities we would do?
Oh how I long to snuggle
in bed with my mom.
Spend quiet times with her.
Listen to the beating of her heart.
Hold her arms and
hands.
Cherish the visible veins in her hands with all the years
of child care for 9 kids.
Whew!
Wonder how painful the swelling of her uric acid build up in the tips of her fingers
that has given her the trade mark shape. Like
tamarind shells.
Last year, around October, I was blessed to see her in a
dream. She was all smiles. She was most radiant.
Oh, how, I long to see her that way again.
To see her beam over her grandchildren.
To update her
of their growth milestones.
I would love for her to listen to her namesake, Marcelina or Lilli, who,
exclaimed, the other day, at McDonalds play area, much to the delight of her
Ate, “ Oh, this is just so interesting!” mimicking her favorite pig, Peppa!
I am sure, mom would
be super pleased at how her Marina loves to hear stories of her. How she
loves the crossword puzzle. How she loves to read and how her granddaughter pursues
these linguistic pleasures as well.
And, maybe, how
she would gently remind me of my figure.
I have not yet been serious about one of her last directives to me, to
maintain a pleasing shape.
And, how, I would
bask in her non-critical
encouragement to take care of myself better.
Knowing, without the need to hear the words, that she
truly loves me, just for being me.
Mom, thank you.
I so miss you!
